Star Wars Fanatic Gets Dish Network

John was a die-hard Star Wars fanatic and a fervent jazz enthusiast. There was nothing in the world that he loved more, that is until the day John came across an advertisement for Dish Network satellite TV. Not only did they offer high definition television (HDTV) and digital video recording (DVR) but they also made available audio-only channel section provided by Sirius Radio Satellite.

“Finally,” thought John. “Everything is coming together.”

The next afternoon John had technicians install a Dish Network HD DVR 921 Receiver in his apartment. As soon as the Dish technicians had left, John logged onto eBay and put all of his Stars Wars DVDs and his entire collection of jazz records up for sale. With Dish Network, thought John, none of these items would no longer be necessary. He’d never again have to fret over scratched DVD copies of The Empire Strikes Back and have the movie skip and pause just before Luke and Darth commenced their light saber fight sequence. DVR would record it for him in pristine HD. And with Sirius Satellite Radio he could fall asleep to the lilting voice of Ella Fitzgerald and the rambling Trumpet of Miles Davis in 24 hour streaming without the scratches and bumps he had to endure with his LPs. And because Dish Network offered the best deal in the galaxy, John also had the television in his bedroom hooked up to the same receiver. Although the six episodes of the Star Wars saga didn’t even amount to 12 hours of total play time, the DVR allowed for 180 of recording capacity.

“I’ll just have to DVR all the George Lucas biographies on A&E and the Biography channel,” John said to himself.

John checked the program guide and saw that Star Wars: Episode II Attack of the Clones was coming on Cinemax. John quickly clicked the remote to the film, then hit the “picture in picture” function and switched the other channel to the audio-only section for the Jazz Traditions channel.

“At last,” John said aloud with his eyes become watery. “Ella Fitzgerald and Darth Vader finally together.” He began to sob loudly. “It’s almost like they’re married.”

Mrs. Ella Vader.

And with that John rode the Dish Network elevator into bliss.

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